The Epic Story
by Kung Pow Skwurul
Summary: NarutoOne Piece crossover containing everything you could look for in a fanfic, except romantic stuff or pairings cause I can't write them worth crap. Fight scenes are gory and detailed, swearing, and a semidark storyline. On indefinite hiatus.
1. The Beginning

This piece of writing shall be forever known as a turning point in the world of literature.

I do not own Naruto in any way, shape, or form. This story takes place after the Rescue Gaara arc in Shippuuden, because I haven't read the manga far enough past that to know character attacks or anything.

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It was like any other day in Konoha. Birds singing, sun shining, and Naruto splurging on yet another eighteen bowls of Ichiraku.

"Itadakimasu!" could be heard throughout the entire village, as he dug into his ramen. His teammate and long-time friend, Haruno Sakura, walked into the little shop.

"Naruto. Tsunade-shishou wants to see us in her office in two minutes."

The blonde looked up at Sakura, bits of noodle dangling from the corner of his mouth. He nodded briefly to indicate he'd be there on time; he still had two more bowls to finish. Picking up a new pair of chopsticks (he'd gone through three already, biting them in half as he slammed heaven into his mouth) he split them in half and looked up at Ayame.

"More, please!"

---

Halfway across town, Hatake Kakashi was also doing some digging in of his own: into the newest Icha Icha book, that is. He strolled through a side street while snickering at a particularly funny event that'd happened in the book.

"Jiraiya-sama writes such good books. I must convince him to write faster so I can read more."

Sakura appeared in a flurry of smoke, standing in front of his path. "Kakashi-sensei, Tsunade-shishou wants you to be in her office in a minute."

"Eh? But I've only just begun to get into the meat of the story—"

"You do realize that if you're late, Shishou will probably smash your face into the ground."

"H-hai." The copy ninja shuddered at the thought of Tsunade's monstrous strength, marked his page, put the book in his pocket and began jumping across rooftops to the Hokage's office.

---

When Naruto arrived, he had just made the deadline with two seconds to spare and half a bowl of ramen stuffed in his oversized mouth. Mustering up as much throat muscle as he could, he forced the huge chunk of material down his throat before noticing the amount of people inside old Baachan's office.

Team 8, Team 10, Sakura, Kakashi-sensei, Team Gai, and a new group of faces he'd never seen before all looked at him.

"Welcome, Naruto," Tsunade's voice silenced everyone else's. "Make yourself comfortable, although keep standing."

She turned to address the whole group.

"I have gathered you all here today to send you on an S-rank mission—"

This was met by gasps and, from Naruto, a shrill girly scream of excitement.

"—which will more than likely severely injure or kill at least half of you."

The commotion in the room died down instantly, and everyone looked worried except for the unknown group in the corner. They looked much like a gang, and the leader appeared to be the one with black hair that wore a straw hat. (AN: zomg, crossover!)

Tsunade continued. "Many, if not all of you are wondering who these individuals are. To keep introductions short, they have come from a sea which they call the Grand Line. Apparently, our country – the hinokuni – and every other country in the land we know are all just part of an enormous island which sits in the middle of the Grand Line. We have apparently never known this because all people who have seen the sights of the coast have been killed by various things on the journey back, be it monsters or starvation or disease (AN: obscure and vague, I know, but it gets more detailed later on.). This group of pirates – kaizoku – requires our help. Robin, if you would like to continue?"

A tall woman with a warm expression emerged from the back of the group. "My name is Nico Robin. I am a member of this pirate crew, the Straw Hat Pirates. We sailed to a rugged area south of this unusually large island one week ago, south of your country; our ship was destroyed in the process of everyone getting to shore. It was washed away and sunk by a large thunderstorm. We were on the run from an exceptionally powerful pirate crew who completely overpowered us and were lucky to get away alive. After three days of endless wandering, we found a small village which helped us recover slightly. We wanted to know if any people knew of powerful individuals who would help us fight a particularly nasty group of pirates. They hesitated to tell us, but spoke of your village. We followed the map that the townsfolk gave us and wound up here.

"Now we ask for you all to help us. We do not ask you this because we were in danger of being killed; it is because that crew most likely knows we are on this island. We, as pirates, stole much of their gold and money before fleeing; they want us dead as a result of that and they won't hesitate to burn down villages and towns in their search. We have all agreed that we will take full responsibility and blame for any lives lost as a result of our running onto this island, but if you help us then the loss of innocent lives will be minimal."

She paused, letting what she'd just said to be able to sink in. After a minute of silence, Naruto spoke.

"Where do we find these guys?"

Robin was startled. She saw the same kind of determination in the blonde kid's eyes that she could see in Luffy's whenever he vowed to do something.

Therefore, it was Luffy who stood up and motioned for Robin to sit. There was silence for a while until Luffy broke it.

"I'm hungry. Do you have any meat?"

The entire room shook as everyone inside anime falled.

After five minutes of finding enough food to last Luffy for an hour, he sat down and started talking.

"We don't know the location of the crew, but all the crewmembers – nine of them – have a shaved head and a tattoo on their scalp; the kanji representing "slaughter". The leader is the only one who doesn't wear a shirt. For now, all that we can really do is wait or go out and look for them…and that's where you guys come in. Our idea is to go out in search parties to each country and do two things: one, inform the people of that country of the situation; and two, to fight with all our strength if we meet up with any of the crew.

"Your Hokage has already split us into groups. I've got the paper some…where…"

Luffy made a frantic search of his shorts and vest before Zolo picked up a scroll from the ground and began to read, much to Luffy's disappointment and cries of "Oi Zolo! I was supposed to read them out!"

"Team A will consist of Hyuuga Hinata, Yamanaka Ino, Chopper over there" - He pointed at a small reindeer-like creature- "Aburame Shino, and Robin, who you've already met. You're going to Kumogakure, the Village Hidden in the Clouds."

"Team B will be me (Zolo), Hyuuga Neji, Inuzuka Kiba, Nami" - A pretty looking redhead waved at the ninjas "- and Nara Shikamaru. We're headed to Amagakure, the Village Hidden in the Rain."

"Team C is Tenten, Sanji" – Zolo motioned to the blonde smoking a cigarette" – "Akimichi Chouji, Maito Gai, and Haruno Sakura. You guys can have fun staying in Konoha as defense."

"That leaves Hatake Kakashi, Uzumaki Naruto, Rock Lee, Luffy, the guy in the straw hat, and Usopp for Team D. You get to go to Sunagakure, the Village Hidden in the Sand.

"We leave in two days to give us time to get ready and all that."

Tsunade finished the meeting by reminding the group to be back in this office in two days.

And so it began.


	2. The Preparation

Naruto awoke the next day at 6 in the morning and headed off to Training Ground 3 for some quick combat practice. He hadn't gotten into any intense fights since rescuing Gaara a month back; the rest of the missions he'd gone on were insanely simple. The hardest thing he'd done besides the Gaara mission was help escort some rich old man to the Bear country and the most difficult part of that was putting up with the man's nighttime snoring.

Luffy, Sanji and Zolo were there, apparently playing some sort of game involving keeping food away from Luffy. Naruto hid in the bushes to look for a moment where he could jump in and surprise them; it came very soon when Sanji and Zolo ended up getting into a fight because the former had tripped the latter during the running around. He leaped out of the bushes, forming two Kage Bunshins and delivering a solid punch to all three men in the area.

"FUCK! Who did th—oh, it's the blonde guy in the stupid-looking jumpsuit from yesterday."

Naruto glared at Sanji, and fired back a retort: "Blondes wearing suits and dress shoes don't look much better."

A minute later, both the ninja and cook were covered in nasty-looking bruises. Naruto was sporting a nice 3 mild concussions from three Collier Coups while Sanji had trouble breathing and difficulty in walking because a certain someone had Naruto Rendan'd him in the lungs on the way up and in the testicles on the way down.

"Oi, are you two idiots done yet?" Zolo was sitting on one of the stumps, Luffy on another.

Sanji replied by slammed his foot into the swordsman's gut, sending him flying backwards a good twenty feet and halfway through a tree. Luffy laughed heartily at the display of pain, but Naruto ended up delivering a Nisen Rendan to the rubberman moments later.

The free-for-all ended when it was lunchtime, three hours and seven minutes later. All four guys, all black, blue, and with swollen testicles, walked back to town for some decent food. Luffy was the one who broke the silence.

"Naruto, what's life like as a ninja?"

He was caught off guard with this question, normally people just took note of the headband and didn't talk unless absolutely necessary. "Well, we go on missions – _nimu_ – and fight people.

"So those techniques you used were ninja moves?"

"Mmhmm."

The restaurant was packed when they went in, but Naruto as a ninja had some influence; besides, some people were finishing up anyways. They sat down for food and didn't get up until 4 PM, at which time the food bill was running up an amount equivalent to about $1,435 USD.

The entire group which was to go on a deadly mission really didn't give off the "Hey, say goodbye to me now cause I might end up with seventeen kunai embedded in my chest and a hole in my stomach" vibe. Hinata and Neji spent the time sparring. Kiba, Shino, and Team 10 just relaxed. Sakura was still Tsunade's apprentice, so she lived life as usual. Kakashi just read Icha Icha for 45 hours; he slept for the last few hours. Gai just did his normal gay thing, and Tenten…well, no one knows. The other 4 Straw Hats explored the village, engrossed in the foreign culture.

As for Naruto, Luffy, Sanji, and Zolo, they fought over and over and over again. Each of them began working on new attacks and battle maneuvers, then tried them out on each other and the trees around them before finally using them on some Kage Bunshins.

Naruto developed something that he called the Kage Rasengan, which involved multiple Rasengans and a clone helping him out. Luffy threw some of his old moves together and figured out how to string them into one another: Mugiwara Rendan. Sanji found Lee on one of his 50-mile runs and the two trained on working with leg attacks. Eventually, Sanji improvised his own version of Lee's Ura Renge, of course Sanji's didn't involve opening chakra gates or moving at ultrasonic speeds. He named his new move the Chikara Renge, or Strength Lotus. Zolo took some normal santoryu attacks and played around with them a bit, and he called his result the Akuma Giri, 'Demon Slash'.

Naruto created a clone which wouldn't dissipate in one hit like usual. Luffy nodded, then ran forward and smashed his fist into the clone's stomach. It doubled over, and Luffy grabbed it and unleashed a one-armed Gaturring Gun before he threw it into the air. Taking a deep breath, he filled his body with air and unleashed a quicker version of his Gomu Gomu no Stohmuu, further propelling Naruto's clone skyward. Before he fell back down, he stretched his arm far up enough to grab the clone by his jumpsuit. Pulling down as hard as possible, he yanked the clone downwards and slammed it into the ground, leaving a medium-sized crater where the impact occurred and screamed out "Mugiwara Rendan!".

Another clone was created, this time for Zolo. He rushed the clone and flipped over it so his back was to the clone's back. Gripping Yubashiri, he jammed its handle into the clone's back and withdrew it quickly. Spinning around, he delivered a series of crippling blows; first slicing where a tendon would be, next a muscle, one hand cut completely off, and finally ended the string of attacks when he raised his right hand over his left shoulder – "Akuma…" and swung diagonally, effectively creating the same gash that Hawk-Eye had done to him back at Baratie. "…Giri!" A three-sword flurry of steel could be seen, and afterwards the clone did not have any more whole organs: figuratively, of course.

Sanji's attack was pretty short and simple. He faked a right knee and instead headbutted the clone, then he brought his entire leg up into the clone's stomach and kicked it straight up with a second blow. Using his leg strength he leaped into the air, slamming his foot into the clone's airborne back. He grabbed it and placed it so it was below him, then grabbed both its arms and repeatedly nailed it with fast-paced kicks in the stomach and face. Right before they hit the ground, he used the clone's stomach as a way to get a bit more lift, spun around three times and finished the devastating combo with an axe kick (similar to the Shishirendan finish, only with more power put into it). He got up, lit a cigarette, and took a drag. "Chikara Renge, bitch."

Naruto was determined to edge out the others. As soon as his clone was poofed into existence, he created another to help him out. He'd already trained himself to create a Rasengan with one hand, and did so while charging the clone and smashing a fist into its face like Luffy. He took the same arm and brought elbow to back of head while the clone was doubled over, then slammed the Rasengan into it on the ground. The other clone jumped down into the small crater that his original had just created and flung his copy into the air. The original Naruto had created two more Rasengans, one in each hand. As the clone came down, he met it mid-way and smashed the Rasengan into its stomach, pinballing it into the air again. He shifted his weight to his feet to fall faster, then bounced back up to grab the scruff of the clone's neck and kneed it before yanking it towards him and inserting a Rasengan into its stomach. As it spiraled downward, Naruto spun up one last, final double Rasengan piecing his hands together and summoning up all his chakra that he could. The helper clone on the ground had been beating the victim clone into the ground before pinning it down for Naruto to hit. The double Rasengan created such an impact that half the buildings in Konoha experienced a sensation not unlike a small earthquake. When the dust cleared, huge cracks were everywhere in the ground and the point of impact was not there anymore. A giant hole was in the ground instead.

Armed with new moves and new friendships, the blonde grinned as he fell asleep the night before leaving for Suna.


	3. The Leaving

**AN: **Well shit. I take a weeklong field trip for school and writer's block sets in…it's been forever since I last updated, no? Anyways, sorry for the wait (to however few readers I have, if any), here's the third chapter. Sort of short…but meh.

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The next morning, four distinct groups were assembled throughout Konohagakure.

"_Team A will consist of Hyuuga Hinata, Yamanaka Ino, Chopper over there" - He pointed at a small reindeer-like creature- "Aburame Shino, and Robin, who you've already met. You're going to Kumogakure, the Village Hidden in the Clouds."_

"_Team B will be me (Zolo), Hyuuga Neji, Inuzuka Kiba, Nami" - A pretty looking redhead waved at the ninjas "- and Nara Shikamaru. We're headed to Amagakure, the Village Hidden in the Rain."_

"_Team C is Tenten, Sanji" – Zolo motioned to the blonde smoking a cigarette" – "Akimichi Chouji, Maito Gai, and Haruno Sakura. You guys can have fun staying in Konoha as defense."_

"_That leaves Hatake Kakashi, Uzumaki Naruto, Rock Lee, Luffy, the guy in the straw hat, and Usopp for Team D. You get to go to Sunagakure, the Village Hidden in the Sand._

Team A had actually already left. Chopper had morphed to Running Point and Robin used her Hana Hana no Mi powers to keep up with the three ninjas as they sprinted across trees (Or in Chopper's case, ran through). Zolo's team and Luffy's team (B and D, respectively) were standing at the village gate, each going over a map of the region or striking up conversations as they prepared to set off. Nami was looking particularly pissed because everyone else in her group was male.

Meanwhile, in the Hokage's office, Sakura was trying to avoid a man in his early twenties hitting her: Sanji. Tenten was polishing her weapons, and Gai and Chouji were doing their own things, which were acting homosexual and eating. Respectively.

Soon, Zolo whistled as a signal for his group to start heading towards Amagakure. He gave the order for Shikamaru to be the group's leader because of his IQ and they began sprinting to the west.

Finally, as the last group to go, Naruto showed his impatience through a series of screams. The group caved and began heading southwest, to the Kazekuni and Sunagakure.

A shadowed figure emerged from one of the thousands of trees surrounding Konoha; this particular one was high enough to get a good view of the village entrance…

"They've left. The time to strike is now."

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What a shitty, overused cliffhanger. Oh well.


	4. The Attack

**AN: **Sorry for such a long wait. Things are finally up and running again; here's chapter four which some of you guys waited so long for. :)

v b B V

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Eight men and two women dressed completely in gray leaped from areas surrounding Konoha; each drew kunai and shuriken. Ten figures suddenly emerged in the streets, twenty-two others lost their lifes near instantly and many more were going to die as well in the few minutes to come.

Tsunade had been looking out her window at the groups setting off, and took notice of some shadows flitting across the air for a split second.

…Wait. What?

She immediately signaled the team in her office to go down and help. They sprang to their feet and ran and sprang out the window, much to the local glassmaker's anguish.

Tenten whipped out her summoning scroll and drew two scimitars from it in a puff of smoke as she landed on the ground and whirled around to come face to face with an insanely creepy person. Eyes totally red, face painted white and black, he looked like a demon. As he swung his right arm (with a kunai knife) in an arc above his head, Tenten dodged the sweep as she ducked and threw herself into his groin-al area then stabbing him in the gut with both scimitars, then slashing her arms out to the side, effectively cutting him in half. As he fell, he was able to position his arm so the kunai went straight into Tenten's shoulder. She fell as well, and could not feel her entire left arm anymore.

Sanji's feet hit rooftop and started to sprint towards the nearest gray figure. As it yanked its katana out of a person's chest, it turned and took notice of a well-dressed man charging at him. Sanji leapt into the air, spun around and planted a powerful kick where the man's head would've been two seconds ago. Instead, his foot was nearly cut into two as his shoe met sharp steel. The man with another man in his sword swung downwards, which really did cut Sanji's foot into two. He screamed harder and louder than he had done before in his entire lifetime as the waiter collapsed to the floor and fell off the roof, bleeding profusely. The last thing he noticed as he blacked out was a flash of pink hair, a cracking sound and a lot of flying organs.

Gai was getting one hell of a workout as he dodged and punched and dodged and kicked a woman and a man, both apparent masters of Taijutsu as well. The fight dragged on and on with all three sustaining a lot of damage; Gai had gotten kicked so hard in the face his nose snapped clean in two (which had, in turn, made him lose a lot of blood plus help hinder his sight). The woman ended up dying painfully as Gai punched her in the neck, and the man's left hip was completely shattered when Gai had Dynamic Entorii'd after bouncing off a wall. It finally ended when Gai, after getting another hard punch to the chest, had finally gotten pissed off so much to the point where he hugged the guy so hard his spine snapped in two almost instantly. The green ninja started the walk, or limp, to the Hokage's office in the hopes that she'd help heal his injuries and take his place in the fray.

Sakura actually was the only one not to sustain any injury, instead she had hopped around from place to place. One gray woman had gotten in her way as she sped to a rooftop where she'd seen the waiter Taijutsu pirate fall, and the woman got a nice chakra-powered fist to the face. She died instantly. Sakura hopped onto the roof behind the robed man and grabbed his arms, forced him into a position much like Sasuke had done to Zaku during the Chuunin exams, and twisted. She then forced a foot through his back to ensure no medical-nin would help heal his 'injury'.

She picked up half of a foot and leaped down, starting to work her medi-skills on mending the foot as much as she could.

Tsunade watched, horrified, as the ninja fell one after the other. She leapt from the window, Shizune not long after, and rushed to Tenten's side; Shizune intercepted Gai.

Unknown to both, six were still left. That was the good part.

The bad part?

They were all heading for Tsunade.

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**AN: **You'll find out what happens to Chouji and the rest of the guys/people/gang next chapter. Hah.


	5. The Attack, cont

**AN:** In the last chapter, 5 died and I said 6 were left. It's not a miscount. Keep reading.

v b B V

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The blonde healer hadn't even fully healed Tenten's shoulder when six gray figures sprang into the air and six arms let kunai fly to their target. She jumped too soon; one pierced her leg and the rest flew into the ground, or what would have been the ground if Tenten hadn't still been lying there. Shizune carried Gai away to finish mending his wounds; Tsunade tried to ignore the fact that one of Konoha's finest Chuunin was stuck full of steel on the ground in front of her and concentrated on coming out of this with her life intact. She leaped into the air with her good leg, running and jumping across rooftops to where she'd last seen Sakura. The six followed.

Sakura had done her absolute best to heal Sanji's foot, and for the time being he would still retain use of both feet. She picked him up, piggyback, and headed for the Hokage's office.

They met halfway. Tsunade saw a flash of pink hair; Sakura saw a giant chest. The medi-nin-in-training continued onwards, prioritizing in her head that helping Shishou was less important than helping this man; Tsunade could handle herself for a while. Tsunade followed instead, and the six once again followed as well.

Shizune had healed Gai to the point where he'd get up and walk within a few hours; he was out cold at the moment though. She saw eight figures approaching as she looked out the window: Tsunade, Sakura-chan, and the six remaining of those bastards. Shizune motioned for the Konoha-nin to hurry up as she formed hand seals and prepared to knockout gas the rest.

Sakura noticed Shizune making hand motions signaling to hurry and get inside, so she did so, Tsunade trailing by two feet. They turned and flung kunai and shuriken at the pursuers, stopping them just long enough to get hit full-on with gas. They crumpled immediately, and Sakura (the only fully non-injured ninja) was sent to check who the mysterious attackers really were.

As she took off their hoods, she gasped at the face she saw. Chouji, the plump Akimichi clanmember, had probably gotten a genjutsu cast on him. The other 5 looked all the same: dressed in gray, white face, red eyes, all that. A closer look showed the kanji for 'slaughter' crudely tattooed on each person's neck.

Sakura returned to the office carrying Chouji.

"Oh my god, Sakura, why are you carrying one of them?"

"'Cause he's one of us. It's Chouji. I think he's gotten himself into a genjutsu or something, can one of you lift it?"

"…Sure, just let me gather up some chakra…"

Shizune went to work on Chouji as well as Sanji while Sakura told Tsunade of the kanji.

"Then it's not just those nine that Robin told us about. There's more…Sakura, I want you to get messages to all three remaining teams. Tell them what has happened, tell them to continue on, and to hurry. We need as many people as we can get, these guys aren't playing around. Tenten is dead" - Sakura gasped in horror – "Sanji almost lost a foot, and Gai was nearly killed. GAI. The Taijutsu master of Konoha. This is urgent, go, go now!"

She gulped and nodded, then jumped out the window.

---

arr and arr please.


	6. The Counterattack

**AN: **Chapter six. Joy.

v b B V

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Sakura gasped for air as she sprinted up the wall of another house; the messenger tower was only another three roofs away. The medi-nin gathered her chakra to her feet and raced at a 90-degree angle up the tower and found her way in through the window. Two ninja who had been on patrol stood inside, expressions of shock on their faces; normally only the Hokage and Shizune came in here, and they always used the stairs.

"No time to explain, gentlemen; go outside to see for yourselves." Sakura pulled out a blank scroll from inside her Chuunin jacket and bit down on her right thumb; she used her blood to write a hasty "Konoha attacked, sustained losses, stay aware, enemies extremely strong, expect an attack from people dressed in gray. -Sakura" note. Forcing chakra into the wound to close it, she rolled up the scroll with a snapping motion using her left hand and tied it to Konoha's fastest messenger falcon and sent it flying out the window. She hopped out after them, returning to Tsunade's office.

All the two ninjas saw were some flashes of pink hair which could apparently speak, a spurt of red, and one falcon/hawk thing missing from its perch.

---

Suna was closest, so the bird flew in that direction first. It only took a matter of minutes for it to find the group heading for the desert – they had only left an hour ago, after all – and swooped down to Kakashi. He intercepted the bird and read the message out loud to his teammates; none of them could hide their shock and surprise. The falcon motioned its leg in a way that said "tie it on again, all the other people still need to see it", so the copy-nin did.

"I think it's safe to say that we're going to be expecting some gray people in a while," Luffy said. "Usopp, I know you got some fancy glasses or something, so put them on and look for anything dangerous."

At that moment, twenty figures leaped from the trees and undergrowth and all the forest terms that you can think of. The team was clearly surrounded; Kakashi counted sixteen on the ground and four hung in the trees. Usopp screamed like a girl while Naruto grinned and Luffy copied the orange ninja and Lee swept the ground in a true battle pose.

"You will all die here and now, Leaf scum."

At that moment, Naruto closed his ring and pinky fingers on each hand. He brought them into a cross position in front of his chest and summoned up a fairly large amount of chakra. All twenty drew their arms back in a "I'm going to chuck this metal knife at your face now" position and let their metal death fly into clones.

"Tajuu Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!" An enormous amount of shadow clones poofed into existence forming a dome featuring thirty-some layers of clones, offering near-total protection from attacks coming from the outside. The sheer amount of space that was just taken up forced the attackers flying; the kunai pierced only the first few layers.

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Kakashi dug into the ground with his Doton jutsu.

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Lee took off his weights (which now included ones on his wrists) and held them in one hand to use as projectiles as he scanned for an opening to attack from.

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Usopp shook off the fear and unholstered a pistol which shot out compressed air (much like Toguro's 100 form), waiting for an opportune moment.

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Naruto ordered a mass attack while laughing softly and forming a Rasengan.

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Luffy jumped sky-high, found a nice gray-clothed target in the trees, and aimed a Gomu Gomu no Stamp at what he thought was a face.

----

Smoke filled the air near-instantly as clones fell one by one: a well-aimed kick here, a fire jutsu to the face there. The clones were able to take down three or four just because a hundred or so had tried to attack each figure.

Naruto's eyes caught a glimpse of gray clothing zipping through the bushes; he charged it and caught it from behind with a nice chakra-filled sphere of death to the spine. A few seconds of painful grinding into his back, and he was launched spinning into a tree. Unfortunately, it had a large, thick, sharp branch growing on it and it was pointed almost directly at the spiralling human…and a most gory and painful ending to his life happened.

Luffy's foot smashed into a man's face, and he fell to the ground in pain and with an odd imprint from forehead to chin. The pirate stretched his arms to the man from mid-air, certain he was not out cold yet; he yanked the gray thing towards him and 'accidentally' performed a head-to-chest Gomu Gomu no bell. Grimacing at the sight, Luffy chucked the body downwards and prepared himself for impact against the ground.

Usopp scrambled for a place where he could aim and shoot people without needing to run around all the time. He found a nice green patch, it was too bad that someone had been hiding there too. The woman who looked up and saw a kid wearing fishnet on his head paused for a fatal second; Usopp was surprisingly calm as he pointed the gun at her head and shot her; this was no time to panic and he sure as hell didn't want to die here, on land. He kicked the corpse aside and crouched down, staying alert at sounds coming from all sides.

Lee shot out of the smoke so fast that he just couldn't be seen. Hop, skip, jump, airborne: two weights embedded into two skulls and one guy missing some bones in his left leg was a direct result.

Kakashi found a woman acting as guard or scout or something; her position didn't matter to him when he yanked her into the earth. As he hopped out of the hole, her head still stuck out; a split second was all it took to chuck a few shuriken in her direction. There was no time to let people off with their life intact; they had tried to kill him so he killed them in return.

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That's another one done. No one's dead. Yay!


	7. The Counterattack, cont

v b B V

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About ten remained, more or less, it didn't matter; they were all trying to kill the Leaf-nin and the pirates, and in turn the attacked were fighting back with a surprising agility. They all sustained some form of injury, though: a kunai embedded here, a gash left by a jutsu dodged a little too late. Mostly, the protagonists of our story were faring pretty well. Those dressed in gray? Not so much.

Naruto and Lee met up in a small patch of grass and stood back to back. Two others sprang from the undergrowth or from the air; it was hard to tell with his right eye caked with blood and the huge amount of chakra he'd spent forming the clone dome and multiple Rasengans.

The world seemed to slow down to both of them, though. Orange disappeared in a flurry of smoke, green sidestepped so quickly that Itachi himself would be confused for a minute. Naruto poofed into the space located directly on top of his attacker and did what they call a footstool jump (AN: Look it up.), slamming him into the ground. Lee rebounded off three trees in rapid succession as he drew his right arm into an L shape; the last one positioned him so his fist could connect with flesh.

He who had gotten kicked straight into a soft pillow of grass got up fast enough to notice a human presence to his rear. Turning, he only caught a glimpse of the Jinchuuriki they'd been sent to capture as the 15-year old let his leg meet a friend named Mr. Right Kidney. At least he was incapacitated, Naruto thought, they would need at least one guy to interrogate.

The other jumped right as he noticed a slight green blur that was much darker in color than any tree around these parts. He grinned slightly at the 'whoosh' passing beneath him and chucked three shuriken at a tree on the opposite side. What they hit was not wood, but instead the shoulder, back, and leg of one of Kyuubi's companions. His target screamed in pain and fell near-instantly; high speed plus sharp metal equals a much harder entry into your flesh.

Naruto saw the flash of metal an instant before he heard Lee. Knowing that he had to get his friend and teammate to safety, he leaped at the man from which the shuriken had come from. Holding three kunai in a Wolverine-ish position, he stabbed the man right in the neck in his blind aim. As blood shot from the man's throat, he ran to where Lee lay in a world of pain and hefted him up onto his shoulders, then leaped into the trees. His destination was where they'd first been attacked; the man with a dead kidney lay on the ground and wouldn't get up for a long time.

---

Kakashi and Usopp were forced into a more sandy, arid, dry place (the change from forest to desert was surprisingly quick) by no less than three of the gray people. Usopp tried his hardest to catch one in any part of their body with his air gun; dodging seemed to come naturally to them and they sidestepped each shot with ease.

The ninja had been gathering up his chakra to a point which would be enough to power a Rasengan to six times its normal spinning speed, then let lightning course through him, his hands acting as lightning rods to draw the electricity to his palm and fingers. Usopp decided to step aside a little; he knew enough about jutsu to know that they didn't differentiate between friend and foe.

Kakashi leapt straight up into the air, and the chasers didn't notice that there was only one guy that they were following until a split second too late. One fell almost instantly as she tried to turn around and throw kunai from afar; the lightning whited out the gory parts but it was known to all that she wouldn't get up after that hole in her stomach. She had gotten lucky enough to leap just far enough that the first Raikiri took off a few strands of hair…the second did far more.

When two heads turned around to see their teammate fall, a certain sharpshooter took the hint and pointed his pistol at the one on the left. With a sharp bang (and another quick three following afterwards) the piercing of a lung happened and a second corpse was freshly made.

One remained to fight two, and that one certainly did not manage to hold onto life for much longer as the teenager fired compressed oxygen (among other gases) into him from the front and the infamous Hatake Kakashi ended him with three quick strokes of his powerful lightning attack. They looked at each other quickly and started sprinting to the forest from which they came.

---

Luffy had gotten lost in the forest and groaned as the two women following him dashed through the bushes. He stretched out an arm forwards and let it fly where he thought one lady would at least see it, instead it hit a tree and was a perfect thing to grab a hold of and rocket towards the freakish guy. One woman did, the other latching onto her comrade's arm. They flew at an incredible speed and slammed right into Luffy's head; this only forced his head forward without actually doing anything to his torso and downwards. His noggin sped to the front and came back so fast that the woman unfortunate enough to stand up half a second before it would hae passed her. She was knocked through three trees and lay on the ground 40 feet away, cracked and broken ribs stopping her from breathing for all eternity.

The other woman jumped into a tree which hadn't gotten cracked in half and flew from branch to ground to tree in a circle, kunai flying out of each tree that Luffy saw. He was smart enough to run so that she couldn't hit him; directly below to be exact. As she jumped, he ran, and as he ran, he punched the tree on his right as hard as he could. The next time she jumped onto a tree and left it, it toppled onto the ground. Stopping in mid-air, she let herself fall to the ground and assumed a fighting stance. What she was thinking, no one knew; one thing was clear though. She wasn't going down like her teammate had just now, she wasn't taking a sandal in the face, she wasn't going to…to…

Her thoughts went unfinished as the man with a straw hat tied to his neck sprinted forward and slammed the heel of both palms into her solar plexus with an insane amount of force. The impact had the power of a bazooka and caused her to fly into the bushes at extremely high speeds. She stopped flying after plowing through two downed trees which slowed her considerably (the leaf makeup made a cushion of sorts) and hitting an old pine tree.

Luffy dusted himself off after watching the figure disappear into the green, put Shanks's hat on his head, and walked in the general direction from which he came.

---

**AN:** The other two groups (okay, one group) will pop up next chapter.


	8. The Calm

If anyone's still reading this thing, then yay. Took me…what, four months to remember that I had a story going? Anyways, here's the next chapter, and I promise to stay away from the amnesia this time.

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"_Team A will consist of Hyuuga Hinata, Yamanaka Ino, Chopper over there" - He pointed at a small reindeer-like creature- "Aburame Shino, and Robin, who you've already met. You're going to Kumogakure, the Village Hidden in the Clouds."_

"_Team B will be me (Zolo), Hyuuga Neji, Inuzuka Kiba, Nami" - A pretty looking redhead waved at the ninjas "- and Nara Shikamaru. We're headed to Amagakure, the Village Hidden in the Rain."_

"_Team C is Tenten, Sanji" – Zolo motioned to the blonde smoking a cigarette" – "Akimichi Chouji, Maito Gai, and Haruno Sakura. You guys can have fun staying in Konoha as defense."_

"_That leaves Hatake Kakashi, Uzumaki Naruto, Rock Lee, Luffy, the guy in the straw hat, and Usopp for Team D. You get to go to Sunagakure, the Village Hidden in the Sand."_

---

Tsunade sat in her office, Shizune missing from her usual spot; she was tending to the injured along with Sakura, as well as working with the surviving ninja to clean up the place. The Hokage looked over the latest reports coming in from the three Teams which had set out, as well as the one which had stayed for defense.

**Team A: Kumogakure**

**Status: Active; none injured or dead**

**Team B: Amagakure**

**Status: Active; none injured or dead**

**Team C: Konohagakure**

**Status: Inactive; 3 injured, 1 dead**

**Sanji: Severed foot, reattaching**

**Maito Gai: Bruised, beaten, broken nose**

**Akimichi Chouji: Possessed, mind deteriorated, recovering**

**Tenten: dead; arm severed, multiple kunai embedded in chest and stomach area**

**Team D: Sunagakure**

**Status: Inactive; 1 injured, returning to Konoha**

**Rock Lee: Three shuriken received in chest, losing blood; shuriken removed**

She shuddered. These ninja were among the finest in the village, and the pirates had such a high bounty on them that if someone had turned them all in, their family would live well for at least ten generations. For mere underlings to reduce Konoha to shame and actually be able to track Lee's speed, it was horrific to imagine the stronger crew members. The pirate captain himself might even possess power equal to that of a god.

Jiraiya arrived on the outskirts of the village, and took note of the gate, which had blood stains on it. As he advanced through the streets to Tsunade's office, his walk became a jog, then a run, then a full-out sprint. The sight was too ghastly to believe, his village so renowned and powerful, nearly slaughtered by the freaks that he'd received a letter about. There were still bodies lying in the streets, and he noted out of the corner of his eye that Shizune and the pink-haired girl – Tsunade's student…Sakuno, was it? – were on cleanup duty.

A minute later, the hermit was in the office, and Tsunade was explaining. Jiraiya was listening. And after that, he jumped out the window and sat down on a roof, now acting as the sole guard for Konoha against the gray pirates.

---

Naruto had done his best to make a stretcher for Lee, but he just wasn't trained in the medical arts. Instead, he yanked out the shuriken (while shutting his ears against all the screaming) and performed all the basic medical crap you do; applying pressure, bandaging, stuff like that. The only objection Lee had was that he didn't like Naruto ripping off a portion of his spandex costume to act as a bandage. Problem was, no matter how much he tried to stop it, the blood just kept coming.

Usopp, Kakashi, and Luffy met up, and shortly after they found Naruto finishing up the worst medical care of all time. Lee was hoisted onto Kakashi's shoulders, as he was the fastest of the group, and they set off back to Konoha. Naruto bit his thumb and wrote the basic details of the situation onto a large leaf he'd picked off a tree, and gave it to a Kage Bunshin which would run back to the village as fast as possible. Pumping chakra into his clone, it exploded with speed as chakra was released from its feet every step through the trees. Within half a second, it was already up to Kakashi, and a second after that, it was gone.

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**AN:** Other teams will show up next chapter. I know I said this one, but I'm changing it. 


	9. The Storm

Chapter 9 be here. Anyone find a saying in the chapter titles so far?

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**Team A: Kumogakure**

**Members:**

**Hyuuga Hinata **_**Chunin**_

**Yamanaka Ino **_**Chunin**_

**Tony Tony Chopper **_**Doctor/Reindeer**_

**Aburame Shino **_**Chunin**_

**Nico Robin **_**Archaeologist**_

Hinata was growing weary. The Byakugan itself did not consume much chakra in a battle situation, but she'd had it activated on full blast for two hours now, scanning the trees for any other human figures. The group had received a report on the current situation, and they'd forwarded it on to Kiba-kun's group.

Kumo was a more northern country, and the cold grew as they ran (galloping in Chopper's case, as he was in Running Point) north. It set in quickly, chilling them all (except Chopper, having grown up on Drum [**AN: **Drum Island is a cold, wintry island for those of you who don't watch One Piece). The temperature was just low enough so that you could see your breath. Ino was particularly pissed, as she'd only worn a light jacket over her normal ninja outfit. She wasn't really cold, just uncomfortable.

After two hours of sprinting across the gradually chilling ground, both Shino and Hinata noticed another presence in the area. The Aburame's kikaichu sensed chakra levels approaching from the west, and Hinata was able to note some quickly approaching objects heading in their direction. The two stopped and motioned for the other three to do so as well, and they all readied battle stances as the horizon revealed a group of ninja dressed in gray.

Shino's kikaichu formed seven exact copies of their master, each unsheathing a kunai knife from their newly formed ninja pouches. Hinata switched off her Byakugan for the few seconds of time they had before they were attacked, for she wanted to rest a bit before plunging into battle. Robin's face drew a grim expression as her memories of a thousand gray figures attacking her nakama as they fled the Going Merry, but she quickly withdrew from inside her head and sprouted some hands in the ground directly behind her. Ino knew that her Shintenshin was pretty futile if the target was running in circles, so she cut her hair with a kunai so that it reached her shoulders. Grinning as she recalled her Chunin Exam match with Sakura, she inconspicuously littered the ground with her hair and covered it up with some snow. Chopper simply morphed into his Strong Point and took one of his hyorogan (courtesy of a certain Aburame).

Hinata activated her Byakugan once more, and took a quick count of the pirate crew. One, two, three… "Thirteen in all." The others nodded in reply, and the last few seconds passed. Time slowed to a crawl.

Then time strapped a nuke to itself and ran into a wall made up entirely of C4.

They seemed to move as a whole, completely synchronizing their movements. Both groups attacked, dodged, defended, and both groups took their share of hits.

Hinata had, under Neji-niisan's tutelage, improved her Juuken to a decent level. She quickly sidestepped a potentially fatal kunai swipe, then jabbed her attacker six times in the face. He wasn't going to die, but would instead suffer some major pain in his skull before passing out. She noted a second kunai flying through the air and deflected it back at its thrower, but her weight had shifted and she was unable to dodge four shuriken as they pierced her left arm. Though she wasn't fatally injured, the shock of it still sent her flying to the ground.

Chopper easily dodged three kunai and was happy to find that he was within grabbing range of an enemy. His gigantic palm completely covered his victim's face and smashed it as hard as he could into the ground twice before throwing his friend's lifeless body at another gray pirate. He morphed into Running Point after ducking to avoid a nasty taijutsu strike and ran off into the distance, hoping to draw one or two people away from the melee.

Ino's hair made the unlikeliest of weapons, but it still proved its worth as its owner released the chakra she'd stored in her cut hair. It sprang to life and caught the legs and ankles of three attackers, and they all fell to the ground. Hard. She took advantage of the moment and quickly threw some kunai into one of her victims as she jumped onto a second's head (he'd been stunned by the fall). Ino's sharpened high heels were particularly painful as they pierced the guy's skull, but she was too happy about the situation to notice the third pirate reaching for her ankles. She fell over as her balance was lost, and the pirate who tripped her broke her hair trap and began beating the crap out of poor Ino.

Shino was gifted with a knack for battle strategies, and although his mind could not even begin to rival that of Shikamaru's, it was still good enough to concoct a plan for the situation. His kikai bunshin simply ganged up on their targets; four on one and three on the other. They overwhelmed and overpowered, and two more corpses were created for his worm friends to feed on. He saw Hinata fall just as the second gray man died, and knew that it was more important to take out the remaining attackers first. If he tried to help her, it would only make him vulnerable to the five or six left. His bunshin retreated to their master's body, and he unleashed his full wrath on the one who had thrown the shuriken at his longtime teammate.

Robin pulled no punches, and no mercy was given to the bastards who had almost killed her friends. There was no emotion in her eyes as she examined the four men who had surrounded her. One was within attacking range of her trap, so she let those hands drag him to the ground and slap his face in. The other three charged, but she expertly weaved through their attacks and made half the bones in their bodies break as she Twisted all three into human pretzels.

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End file.
